Born From the Womb of Silence

by Jennifer Terran

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    The latest album from Jennifer Terran.

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about

After 9 years of blood, sweat and tears, a record incredibly close to my heart... a full body, mind, soul expression. Reflections on life universal, family, birth, death, the beauty weaving throughout all of it, between all of us... all we find hard, all we are of... the beauty, the muck, the expanse.... the silence from which all things arise.. the space between all "things"... silent, indifferent, witness.

Hope it moves you.

credits

released 16 October 2012

PRODUCED & MIXED* BY:
Jennifer Terran

MUSIC, LYRICS, & STRING ARRANGEMENTS WRITTEN BY:
Jennifer Terran

RECORDING ENGINEERS:
Jennifer Terran & Husky Hoskulds

MASTERED BY:
Husky Hoskulds (w/ Jen)

*"Railia" mixed by Husky w/ Jen


_________________________________
THE MUSICIANS:

Jennifer Terran:
Voices, piano, keyboards, echoplex, finger piano, body percussion

Todd Sickafoose:
Bass

Danny Frankel:
Drums & Percussion

Tim Young:
Electric guitar & Banjo

Misha Bodnar:
Cello

Lorand Lokuszta:
Violin

Phoebe Moon Ray:
Background vocals, "weee!"

Ada Sycamore Ray:
Voice


This record was written over the span of the making of my family from conception to present time.. about a 9 year in the making creation.

Recorded at The Barn in Santa Barbara, CA U.S.A. from 2008-2012

Copyright Jennifer Terran 2013 Grizelda Records/ ASCAP
All rights reserved

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Jennifer Terran Santa Barbara, California

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sounder of echo and source, emotive universal and the sensual ahhhhhhh... recorder, performer, piano-er, spinner of words, consonance, dissonance, harmonic explosiveness... one who needs nature, inspired human connection, mother, world & life traveler of soul, mind and heart, and here to meet you in the beautiful folds of the music... you-me-us-on ... more

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Track Name: Born From The Womb Of Silence
I was poking through the dark with my hands stretched out
til I bumped into Nothing...
Who listened without judgement
And I'd like to stay here, but the future pulls me under
as does the old familiar story still fighting to be heard

"If I could just kill the killing mind" (exclaims the killing mind),
I'd throw a party
for the one and only moment
and I'd like to stay to play
but I've an appointment with the future
It's an old chronic story still fighting to be heard

Did my mom prepare me for pain?
Now I'm hearing the siren up on the highway
All the suffering....
while the cars keep busy moving on the freeway.

Consider that sound is born from the womb of silence....

And all things come from nothing
and I'm just an echo of you...
A song that's bounced off the wall of the current
which is moving from the motion of the stars...
and the moon and the sun and the force behind that
When I was young my mom told me that God created us
And I asked her 'well then, who created God?'
And she said, 'that's just not something that you ask'
But we ask and we ask and we're asking...

Did her mom prepare her for pain?
Now I'm hearing the siren up on the highway
All the beauty!
still the cars keep busy
moving on the sleepway

Just too busy to pull off of the sleepway
Gotta keep busy can't pull off of the sleepway
'don't have time'
time, time, time, time, time, t-t-t-t time
time, time, time, time, time t-t-t-time

Rolling over and over yesterday
freaking out about tomorrow
when there's only
NOW.
Track Name: Once
Once you were a little baby in your mama's belly
then you took your first breath and you crawled across the floor
then you stood on your feet then you walked out the door

The silent hawk will change the view that's been given
so you reach for THEN when it's just like this for a minute
Don't miss it!

Once you were a shrunken man with an failing, aching body
then you were a bowl of ash being tossed into a wave
fish comes by now and has a little taste

The silent hawk, will change the view that's been given
So you reach for then, when it's just like this for a minute
Don't miss it!

Once you were a little baby in your mama's belly
Just another face of one, of one, of one
just another face of One.
Track Name: Night Gives To Day
Oh song wake me up from this slumber of muck
oh I hope I don't suck for the one growing in me
and life stretches on so pale as hormones rebel
feel like a puppet from hell as the ride rides me

Think I'd like to go on a sleigh in the snow
or see the Aspens turn and glow
change my hair, I don't know!

I fight the fall of the death of my soul again
it seems like it goes when the muse is away
and what is the point of this is when you even get your wish
is wherever it takes you still AH HA!… here you are.

My mom would run away, take us kids, change her name
but the dark still remained like an old stubborn stain
To fix it at the source could take a life time (instant) of course
but to regret this, I can't cause I've seen it before
how night gives to day, gives to night, gives to day
gives to night, gives to day, gives to night, gives to day.
Track Name: Poppy Seed
Slight as a poppy seed
you divide, divide, divide, divide like you could swallow me
The storm gets wild when life's creating a child

I'd been angry in my life for the brunt I bared
from my mom to her mom to her mom's mom...
a legacy of despair
I was fed her pain
well I WILL NOT LET IT BE THE SAME!

Heartbeat...sweet pea....
growing on my wall
brought here
hungry
with a mom
who wants it all

Heartbeat, sweet pea
growing on my wall
we're brought here
we're hungry
and we've so much love
we've so much love

Heartbeat, sweet pea
growing on my wall
we're brought here
we're hungry
but we've so much love
we've so much love

Heartbeats!
Track Name: Wedding Day
It's our wedding day
and there's friends and family among us
Everybody wants to hear what we might say
about our love and what love can promise
In a world where all things change
What's really real? What is love? what is this?
And what can I know?

I know love can cut through all that we are
It glows like the moon's light. It helps me get home
And you're so sweet, so Landon Ray

There was so much love
that we had to make our baby monkeys
and the act of bringing life
with the unknowns that come with it
I had never been here before until you
And love and trust I knew how to do

I know love can cut through all that we are
It glows like the moon's light.
It helps me get home
and your my sweet.. Landon Ray
Track Name: Landon Ray
We kicked up the dust in each others' soul
uncovering a love that would fight to flow
You said you thought that you would be good for me
now I want to make you a star on my new CD
oh baby, you're amazing

Why?

Accused of being an uncommitted man
never to reciprocate the longing his girlfriends' had for him
but what's so different about me might you say?
I'm just the one who is the one for Landon Ray
It's crazy.. now we're making babies

Why is your smile so sweet?
I hope I get to see it on our monkeys' face
Why do I get to explore with you all the things I never dared to do
Why have you been able to reach into my soul
in a way that no one before could ever go?
Why oh sweety. Why?
Track Name: Metisse
In a meadow far away
where green's as green as blues get blue
A froggy named Metisse
greets the spring and morning dew
with 3 legs instead of 4
He hops his best in a world where more means more
He flees from larger beasts
To stop the push for him as feast

Now I've felt like that frog
Outcast, sad, defensive song
like the part between my teeth
We braced me down so I would not have to be unique

And do I have the love to let you be a baby dove
with a clipped wing or a brain that's not as sharp as the others
And those mama's nowadays will numb your greeting here
to avoid the good pain
And that's the modern way..
Keep umbrella's taut
Don't touch the rain.
Track Name: Ada Wind
It was an Ada wind that came through that night
scraped the sky clean, made the stars bright
A soft sensual whirl, that blew my doors open
But when night gave to day, the storm had eroded

Aaaaa aaaaa aaaaaa Ada win
Where is my Ada wind?

turn… turn… turn.. turn
ya turn.. turn.. turn… turn

They would have called us wrong
Our pause in the song…

If we had gone that day
they would have taken you away my babe.
oh my babe!

Ada Ada oh my Ada wind
Here comes my Ada wind.
Track Name: Together
You and me are going to go through together
open, open, open, open, open, open…
What they call suffering, what they call pain
Is really the mystery and the secret to the big bang
keep going, going, going, going, going, going….

I have no choice but to be with this moment
Nothing's prepared me for it
but I want to see your eyes open
And watch you take your first breath…

Wa hahaha
And feel your velvet skin
Wa hahaha
I want to breath you in
Wa hahaha

Here on this high edge the view is amazing
so open, open, open, open….
Few get to see it because they believe
the fall would be unforgiving
They've forgotten, forgotten, forgotten how to trust but
you're gonna find your way down.
Like they've done it before and before and before
And I want to welcome you here
and kiss you on the rolly mouth…

Wa hahaha
And feel your velvet skin
Wa hahaha
I want to breath you in
Wa hahaha
Wa hahaha
I want to really be here
All the way here for you
Wa hahaha



You and me are going to go through together

OPEN

mmmmmmm
Track Name: Monkey Moo
Oh little monkey moo
the stars are bright tonight
the moon is new and so are you
And home… we get to be home

Oh little love of mine
the light is in your eyes
the moon is new and so are you
And home… we get to be home
oh
Track Name: Phoebe Walking
Phoebe walking. ABCs.
The first year of your life
just passed me… a deep breeze
through Sycamore leaves

Will this haunt me all my life?
all the sweetness I largely miss...

The real point of this… the music...
Free falling tears come easy for you.
Amazing are all things
when you can be here… really be here.

Will this haunt me all my life?
All the sweetness I largely miss.
Track Name: Two Inch Man
The two inch man
thinks your crazy to get down in the dirt
on your knees and your hands
The two inch man will advise you
to be cautious, burn your junkmail
never marry again.

Experience is a tricky little bastard
that can lead you to believe you are wise
You've known safe compromising
but can you still see the view you once knew
when you were a child?

The two inch man makes a mighty loud voice
like a frog singing in the night
it just goes on and on... and on
and he makes large shadows at night
It's time to shine the light
on that stubborn little guy
maybe water him with rain or dew
He just might grow again
before his brief stay in time
gets to be through.
Track Name: Ralia
I want out of the conversation
I want IN to the Raili aili ahhhh
If I got to space, would I enjoy the place?
Or think to get somewhere else
any place else than where I am.

I want the glow from the inside.
Soup so slow.. so Raili aili ahhhh
I'll sing a song that no one else can hear
YES.. if it brings me here.
Yes if it brings me here
If it brings me HERE.

Oh oh oh oh oh ah
Oh oh oh oh ah
Oh oh oh oh ah oh ah
#%&#*+

At first I thought this song was stupid
And what the hell is Raili aili ah?
But then I held my hand
got my head out of the sand
Cause who am I to not let in
What's offered to me beauty, beauty
Repeat, repeat until the light goes deep
Cause I decide what makes lighting in the sky!

Oh oh oh oh ah
Oh oh oh oh ah
Oh oh oh oh ah oh ah
Track Name: Peppers
Peppers on the pepper trees
Pepper trees leaning
on voluptuous seas
Like my dear sweet valley
where my voice is sure
and the ears that wonder
how I could ever forget to be heard…
Track Name: The Dot
I sit at the wall
my eyes watching the dot on the surface
And I'm hearing the sounds
that don't get noticed when I'm thinking
And I want to get up cause I'm so antsy and so itchy

Don't fight the pain… the talking, talking
just let it reign
And don't try so hard
Just stare at the dot

I stare at the wall
and watch the madness of my thinking
and I want to get up and slip back in the dark
the comfort of the dark

Don't fight the pain… the talking, talking
just let it reign
and don't try to stop
the hell that comes up
Watch how it plays… madness, madness
It's so insane
Ego's so smart. Disguised as my heart

This song's nothing new
It even has a key change or two
Blah, blah, blah, blah
Just stare at the dot

Stare at the dot
mind you are not
Watch with your love
and ALL you're made of
Just let it be. ALL that you see
All you find hard. All you are of.

I'm not the game.
I'm not insane
Thoughts will be thoughts
Unbind my heart
Stare at the dot
Mind you are not
Unbind my love. Unbind my heart.
Track Name: Meadow Of Sound
The Earth turned in her sleep
A thousand mamas weep
for their babies who've gone missing.
The ocean inhaled, let out a mighty exhale
When I heard the waves got to 40 feet
I thought of Phoebe…
my sweet, lucid eyed girl

I'm back in the meadow of sound
walking on a soft wet ground
because the sky has been crying.

Tragic experience never makes much sense
but it can make the music sound again.
When your pen falls in your cup
you better drink it up
before your mind gets in the way again.

Cause we're just The Flame.. the burns in
and who will burn out of this world.
Track Name: Between These Doors
Tiny seeds get sprouting, get growing
born from the womb of the no thing
These stars and mountains my monkey
are the freckles on your nose
time comes and time goes

How do we come in and how do we go out
and between these doors
what do we make ourselves about?

How do we come in and how do we go out
and between these doors
what do we make ourselves about?
I want to be of the ocean
then I want to be of the land
can't I just be where I am?

And can I see
what I really am.
What I really am.
Can I see?
To see, to see, to see, to see, to see….
to the sea….